Thursday, September 18, 2008

Lovely Martha

Martha's having a contest! I'd better step up my blog appearance...and soon!

Things & thoughts on this thrilling Thursday:

+Dear Facebook: Please provide larger thumbnails on profile pages. I don't want to friend request my old boyfriends, I just want to stalk them and see if they're bald and/or fat.

+Dear Mr. Mechanic: Thank you for not charging me for the diagnosis of my radio cutting out every time I go over a bump. I'm glad I only have to buy a new radio-- could be much worse. Also, thank you for not mentioning the footprints and bird poop on my hood, how raunchy the inside is, and for not asking me how the passenger front quarter panel got munched (ahem, I got too close to the lawnmower in the garage).

+Dear Janie & Jack: Let there be a super duper cute outfit on sale for me to buy at your shop. Baby Ronin will be here today (nearly 3 weeks early!), and I didn't plan ahead.

+Dear Patron Saint of Skinny Women: Make at least ONE of the hubby's co-worker's wives weigh over 140 lbs tomorrow night. I don't want them to be scared that I may eat them.

That is all. Hope you are planning something WONDERFUL for the weekend! I'm trying to talk the hub into taking the girls to the DIY Fest in Ferndale.


Early Bird Special said...

Dear Sarah,

This post is so funny! I especially love your letter to Facebook. I can totally relate. Umm, why aren't we friends on Facebook??

Amy Bindel

Amelac said...

Sarah, I'll be selling at the Peoples Art Festival on Sunday from 11-4, hope you can come to that, too!

Kate K said...

You so funny. Who is having a baby? Not your brother??

I am over 160 pounds, so I can eat you. (And on a good day I'll always be over 140 pounds). Is that the goal for skinny bitches - under 140?

Cristin said...

Oh I could eat a 140 pounder no problem!!!


Joel S. said...

As Sarah's brother, I can attest to the fact that I am not having a baby (that I know of, yet). In fact, I have so shirked my baby-having duties that Sarah has been forced to "adopt" her cousin in an attempt to gain more nieces/nephews!