Wednesday, July 30, 2008

And Speaking of Speaking of Ugly Children....

I'm sooooooooo with Cristin on this topic! Aside from politics, there are subjects that are just taboo. More specifically, I believe there are way more ugly babies and children in this world than cute.

As you know, we've been working on potty training Q. She has become obsessed with the book Once Upon a Potty, and I was reading it about 4 times a day at least. I found the DVD at the library yesterday, and guess what we've been watching incessantly?

I wish I hadn't opened Pandora's box because the thing haunts my dreams. After the cartoon, there is a "Potty Song" which features several of THE UGLIEST children I've ever seen in my life. I hope none of those kids are readers of my blog-- they are probably like 20 or so by now, but I'm SORRY, their parents should be ashamed of themselves. It would be ok if they just let them roam the streets like most ugly kids, but the point that they actually put their children in a DVD to share their ugliness with the world is just wrong. It's like someone said, "This tastes bad, taste this."

Without further ado, Ugly kid #1:

What makes it worse is that's a boy, "Nicholas". I'll bet that kid gets his ass whooped on a daily basis if he still looks like that.

I forgot to take a pic of Ugly Kid #2, but he is homely as hell and has bright red hair and, even as an infant, he looks like he smells like B.O. His name is Kevin.

And la piece de resistance, Ugly Kid #3.

That's a GIRL, "Emily". I had a dream last night about those toddler fangs of hers. Yeesh!

Since I am on a meany roll, let me tell you about my quasi-bad experience with Alchemy. Just annoying more than anything I guess. I said I wanted these mushroom bookends made because I can't find them anywhere.

I accepted a bid, was told I'd get design sketches, never received them, then simply received a pic of the finished product after the fact (well, THIS was the finished product; the picture I received was entirely different/weird colors):

Yeah, they're cute, but not at all resembling the pic I had shown. And I was stuck. She wouldn't refund my money, only credit to her store which wasn't really my taste (to put it nicely). Oh well. Win some, lose some. I'll make do with the phallic bookends (poor me, right?).

Lastly, I'm so excited I found some cheap blocks so I can make something that's been floating around my head since I bought this cute LRRH puzzle last summer. Time to brainstorm!!!!

Happy Hump Day, All!!!



cyndyava said...

OMG, You are too f'n funny!!! Love it!

Anonymous said...

Those bookends do not look anything like the picture! There are some of "those" kids in the Baby Einstein movies too.

Shelly H

Jenna Z said...

Oooh, that's too bad about the bookends. They are a little....strange. I've never used Alchemy, I browse it once in a while for things I might possibly be able to help someone out with but have never really felt inspired by anyone's post. Have you ever made being on the making end not the buying end?

Cristin said...


Those kids are truly hideous.. I bet their mother's committed suicide...

naomi said...

hey lady! i think i can order the real bookends that you are looking for from my cram cream / decole supplier. i'm probably placing an order in the next couple of weeks if you are interested!


Jessie said...

What's wrong with a little phallic symbol on your daughter's bookshelf?!? Charming.

Kari said...

I agree, those bookends are not at all like the ones you requested (which are totally cute). I'm in the middle of my first Alchemy experience right now....I wanted some little felt mushroom ornaments. I'm waiting to see the finished product any day now. I'm going to decorate a Christmas tree in a "magic forest" theme this year - mushrooms, gnomes, owls, etc. All of your cute decor in your little girl's room has inspired me! It's such a great theme.

KDLOST said...

Hi! So I stumbled across your blog and this post made me laugh so hard I almost cried. TOO funny!

Simply Nichole said...

Even though I feel that all babys are cute (with faces only a mother could love) this post KILLED me. I'm in my cubicle laughing at work. :]